Feelin' it.

It has hard to believe that three...four?...years ago I felt like hell all the time. Hell like I can't describe. The worst part is that I didn't even know I felt like hell. I thought it was normal to feel like a log, like your feet are made of anvils, that I had some weird yawning disorder, that I was just one of those people who sleep all the time.

Well, I am finally recovered from my recent "glutening" and it feels wonderful. I feel strong, healthy, and determined, and most of all THANKFUL.

So, today went well. I didn't eat exceptionally well and I didn't get to the gym. But, I didn't blow it either. I got everything done on my list, and enjoyed an amazing fresh juice from Whole Foods. I've got my food for my road trip tomorrow, and I am happy.

That's all that matters really, isn't it?

<3

Seven months later...

...and what the WHAT?!?

I have not changed one iota from my last post. Actually, I've gotten worse. Weight has gone up five pounds and I'm not working out.

WELL. We'll just have to see about this.

This week I suffered a terribly gluten reaction. I haven't experienced pain and mental fatigue to that degree in a long, long time.

The good part about going through it, though, is that it makes my inner hippie come screaming out. I want to eat good, meditate, dance in the rain, and grow food. I want to be a vegetarian for a few days. I want to cook, clean, purge, organize. I actually love this feeling.

So, I'm going to plan out my next moves. But first, meditation.

<3

New years again...

Ah, here we are again. January 1, 2014. 

2013 was a rough year. REALLY rough year. And yes, good things did happen, but it was definitely not a winner. 

I have good feelings about 2014, though. I'm entering it feeling wonderful, unlike last year, and things have been put in place over the last six months or so to make these next few ones much more productive. 

My only resolution this year is very personal: health. Top notch health. Mental, physical, emotional, personal, and community. So, each week I am going to start a new habit. I tried this last year and did not succeed, but things are very different this year and I know I can do this. 

Week 1: Tea every day. 

It seems like such a simple thing, and it is...but with incredible health benefits. The act of making tea has its own routine and requires a moment to stop and think, observe, smell and taste. I have a special handmade pottery mug that is my "tea mug" and just touching it, bringing it to my lips, makes me smile. 

So yes, habit #1 is "Tea every day." 

Its working.

I've just sort of unofficially completed something like a "Phase 1" of my transformation.

For the past month, I've been working out 3-4 times per week with intense cardio and heavy weights. I have been tracking my food religiously, and counting my calories. I have lost six pounds and am seeing some small changes to my body.

Now it is time for "Phase 2". It is time to make official what my goals are, my plans, and my path to get there.
 
Bodybuilding.com has a fitness plan called Zero to Hero in One Year that is exactly what I'm looking for. I have been following the workout schedule for two week and really like it. It is efficient and straightforward and undoubtedly effective.I have also started the Hundred Pushup Challenge which has a handy little app to help.

What makes things different, as of this moment, is that I am jumping in whole hog. No more toe-in-the-water type thing. Time to JUMP.

I've been telling people that I am considering making a goal of doing a figure competition by this time next year. I say it with a laugh, and continue to give myself an "out". Well, I'm done with that. This is it.

By October 1, 2014, I will be in a condition to compete.

There, I said it.

Transformation update.

One month in and things are going well.

I'd like to introduce you to a terrific little app that I've been using to help me track my food and exercise. This is unlike any app, program, or system I've used in the past. It is not terrifically easy to use and very positive.

Noom Weight Loss Coach

I think the thing that really sold me on it, though, is that the exercise calories aren't one for one. Just because you burned 500 calories doesn't mean you can eat 500 more, as many plans allow you to do. I don't know what their algorithm is, but it makes a whole lot more sense.

My current struggle is my love of sugar and other junk overrides my good sense. I can stay within my calorie limit, but I "spend" it on Hershey bars and potato chips. Even with my awesome workouts this past month, I won't see the changes I want to unless I get the diet under control.

This week I'm going to make a terrific effort to get this diet ball rolling. Lets see how this goes.

Extremes.

These last few weeks have been some of the worst I have experienced in my life. I suppose I should count my blessings that this is the worst it has been, but at the same time I cannot excuse it and cannot allow it to continue.


Starting with the suicide of one of my dearest friends and the animalistic drama following, adding in the concern that my beloved grandfather may be getting tried for murder following an accident in which his daughter, my aunt, was killed (as if he hasn't suffered enough), adding in numerous instances where my faith in community and mankind has been repeatedly crushed...well, I am simply starting to fall apart at the seams myself.

I am somewhat unsure how to proceed. I know that I have to regroup, but it seems like such a monstrous task.

There are certain things that I know will help, such as yoga, meditation, and healthful eating. I am going to spend some time putting myself first for once.

Vegan challenge, day 1!

Day one went off without a hitch. Almost.

I did manage to down an ENTIRE box of gluten free cookies. Yeah. That wasn't good. But it was vegan.

Breakfast was not pleasant. I made crock-pot oatmeal as follows:

1 c. steel cut oats
4 c. unsweetened almond milk
1 tbsp cinnamon
2 chopped apples
Cook on low for 8 hours

It came out like porridge, which in itself isn't bad, but my sweet-tooth was entirely unsatisfied.

Of course, that is part of the point of this challenge, isn't it?

I've got it in the fridge for tomorrow, but I will be adding a very little fresh squeezed cane juice and some salt on the suggestion of some friends.

Lunch was a disgusting vegetable juice drink. NOT pleasant and made me gag.

Dinner, now that's something different. I figured it would be safe to have a pasta dish as my first vegan dinner. After all, I love pasta, so what could go wrong?

Nothing. Nothing went wrong. This is delicious.

I made Pasta and Vegetables with White Sauce with the suggested additions of sun dried tomatoes and kalamata olives from my new favorite blog Fat Free Vegan Kitchen. Here's how it looks:

Granted, its a terrible image, but you get the idea. Basically, its a toss of steamed veggies, (gluten free) pasta, and a sauce based on almond milk and nutritional yeast plus spices.  Not much that can go wrong with this.

So yes, now I have a wonderful lunch for tomorrow, and time to make yet another recipe for dinner.

I can do this.